Normal With You
by xonceinadream
Summary: They both have nightmares. The only thing that helps is the comfort of the other. - Jean and Scott have been my favorite pairing since long before I was in fandom. I have posters of them on my wall. Jean and Scott are perfect to me and the day I find somebody who makes me feel the way Jean and Scott do maybe I'll consider a romantic relationship for myself. Happy Valentine's Day!


She'd thought that the nightmares would get better after they defeat Apocalypse but they get worse. The red threatens to consume her, fire burning bright and hot all around her. She tastes the ashes in her sleep, making her cough and choke but it still doesn't wake her up most nights. She still has to suffer through it. Something's there. Something's coming and unleashing her powers just seems to have made it worse.

At least she can control it better now. She doesn't get woken up by Charles telling her that she's scaring the children by causing the earth to shake. No, now she can deal with it privately. Or she would. She could. She doesn't want to though. When she's finally jolted awake, hell and brimstone still dancing before her eyes, she stumbles out of bed, the wood floor cold underneath her bare feet as she hurries towards the one place she finds comfort in the middle of the night.

Scott has his own room for reasons similar to her. They're scared of him, of his powers, of what he can do. They're scared of his attitude and they're scared of being woken up by the nightmares that he has in the middle of the night. At least he doesn't cause the entire planet to shift, Jean thinks with a spark of jealousy that she knows is highly unfair.

"Jean?" Scott asks as he wakens to the soft pad of her feet across the floor of his room. He's a light sleeper for the same reason she is. Maybe that's why she finds so much comfort in him. The red glow of his eyes underneath his sleep goggles steadies her and she lets out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. "Are you okay?"

Such a loaded question, she thinks. It's one that he always asks her, voice rough from sleep. Jean should feel guilty for interrupting him like this, waking him up, but sometimes she jolts him out of nightmares too. They sleep better when they're together.

"No," Jean whispers, honest to him in the dark. Scott doesn't push, doesn't question, simply lifts up the blankets and Jean slips gratefully under them. She lays on her side, facing him, the dim glow indicating that he's staring up at the ceiling. Her body is still trembling from the vivid nightmare and she bends her knees until they're just barely pressing against Scott's legs.

The silence is comfortable, both teens used to Jean in Scott's bed at least once a week if not more. Jean's breathing slowly calms and when she's less jumpy, one of Scott's arms comes out to wrap underneath her, cradling her shoulders gently. She closes her eyes, taking comfort in the simple touch and scoots a few inches closer so that she can feel his body heat next to her, although she doesn't touch him.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Scott asks when she's just starting to think that she might be able to go back to sleep, secure in his hold. He asks that too every time that she comes in. It sounds like he's genuinely concerned which always warms Jean's heart. Most of the time she doesn't want to talk about it. The nightmares are too horrible to repeat and she knows that Scott wouldn't be able to help her. Nobody really can. The only one who can is the Professor and he's pretending it isn't happening.

Tonight is one of the different nights, though. Tonight, Jean wants to talk about it because what she saw scared her more than normal. She wants to know if Scott can give her another perspective. She wants to know if Scott might believe her. Maybe he could be an ally to help her fight whatever is coming. She opens up her eyes to look at him. "The Professor thinks that I'm just imagining it. That my mind is projecting my fears into something that I know is to be feared. Fire and destruction. But I know that he's wrong," Jean says quietly.

Scott's silent, except for a breath that Jean's close enough to actually hear. "That's what you dream about?"

Jean blushes, surprised to think about the fact that she never even told Scott what it is that she dreams about. She starts and then stops, stumbling over her words. "For the most part. It's fire red and it engulfs me but it doesn't hurt me." It's hard to get the words out, to explain something that seems to be a part of her. "It hurts other people, though. The ones that are around me. It's like I burst into flames and those flames suck people in."

The silence feels like it's threatening before Scott nods. He doesn't look scared, though, and Jean lets out a breath of relief that she hadn't realized that she'd been holding. "Well, maybe the professor is right," Scott says softly. He lifts up his hand in a placating gesture when Jean's eyes narrow. "Hey, it's worth a shot. I thought he was a fool when I first met him but the guy seems to kind of know what he's doing. Could be that's what it is. It's just your subconscious mind. That sounds like something that a subconscious would do, right?"

Those words force a laugh from Jean and she shakes her head. "Scott, never change," Jean whispers, a soft smile playing on her lips.

Scott grins back, pleased with himself over the simple joke. "I don't plan on it."

Then his arm, which had been resting on her shoulder, moves so that he's holding her completely. His hand rests on the small of her back, over her nightgown. "You know, if you do catch on fire, I'll try to help you," Scott teases, making Jean laugh again.

"Thanks for the concern but the fire won't hurt me. I'm afraid of it hurting you and everybody else," Jean responds. She wants to tease and joke and just let herself be free of this nightmare but she can't forget it. She's dreamed of killing her parents violently. She's dreamed of killing Scott. She's dreamed of killing Kurt and Ororo and the Professor and so many other good people. Those dreams haunt her.

Scott looks at her quizzically, as if he's studying her and she frowns, looking down and then back up at him. She's realizing why she never wants to talk about her own nightmares and so she changes the subject before he can speak again. "What are your nightmares about?" Scott shrugs a shoulder, as if it doesn't matter and Jean smiles. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

"It's not that I don't want to," Scott responds, sighing quietly as he turns his head, looking towards the wall instead of her. She can't tell exactly where his gaze is underneath his sleep goggles but she's fairly certain he's avoiding looking at her. "Alex. Well, mostly Alex and my old school."

Jean nods, tentatively reaching up to rest her hand on his bare chest, feeling the ripple of muscles that grow every day underneath her touch. She expects to feel him tense or push him away but instead he just draws in a sharp breath that makes butterflies erupt in her stomach. "I heard about what happened," she says gently. "Or… you told me subconsciously. The first time we met."

Scott grits his teeth. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Jean says with a shake of her head. "Everybody does it. I try not to pry but sometimes people just think so loud that it's hard to miss it. You had a wall up. You were kind of a jerk because of it."

Jean hesitates then. What she's saying isn't a lie. Scott had been a jerk to her when they'd met but Jean had understood. Scott's mind had been overwhelmed with images of what he'd gone through and it had taken Jean hours to sift through them in her own mind. She would never go into Scott's mind to rearrange without permission but sometimes she wanted to ask if she could.

It isn't easy having the powers she does around somebody she cares about. She wants to help but she knows that she can't just go in and rearrange their mind. There are things she wants to see from him and she has to constantly remind herself that she can't force it. Sometimes it's hard to be normal.

Jean has accepted that she isn't exactly normal, though, even though she sometimes had to be and it's nice because Scott isn't normal either. She'd do anything to take away his past but it makes it easier for her to be comfortable around him.

Even though Jean can't actually see his eyes, she imagines that they're looking at each other when he turns his head again. She can feel his heartbeat underneath her palm and he starts rubbing slow circles against her back.

Her breathing is sharper now and she hopes that he doesn't notice. It's hard not to have a visible physical reaction when laying so close to a boy that she likes like this. After all, she's only human. And while she's not normal in some ways, she's very normal in others.

"Jean," Scott says quietly, breaking into her thoughts. "Why did you start coming to me with your nightmares?"

Jean hesitates before deciding that the only thing that she can think to tell him is the truth. "Because you have them too."

"How did you know, though?"

"I just knew, I think," Jean responds after a moment. It's hard to explain but Jean wants to try. She wants Scott to understand that everything about her is drawn to him. "My mind just knew that you shared a connection with it. Even if I didn't know what that connection was."

Scott makes a low sound in his throat of contemplation. She really doesn't want to be so attracted to him. Not him. He has so many problems of his own. Jean doesn't want to deal with other people's problems when she's so busy trying not to let her own nightmares overwhelm her. Jean can't help the way that she feels about Scott, though. She'd known from the very beginning when they'd first met that there was something about him.

"So our minds are… connected?"

"I suppose you can say that," Jean responds. "It's something that I've only felt a few times before. I have that kind of connection with my sister. Sometimes even when I'm not anywhere near her I can still hear what she's thinking, as if I'm right next to her and making an effort to read her. The first couple of nights that I was here, I knew that you were having nightmares too."

Jean wants to continue, to say that she had felt this before but she doesn't. She wants to tell him about how she had dreamed of a boy with red eyes when she was a child. She had walked in his dreams and he had walked in hers but she knows that it would make her sound crazy. Perhaps she'll tell him another time.

"I suppose that makes sense," Scott says, his voice low, nodding. "With your nightmares like that, your mind would want to reach out to somebody with similar feelings. As long as it brought you to me it has to be good."

Then, as if he had known what she'd been thinking earlier, she can feel him. Suddenly he's not making any effort to hide his affection for her like he normally does. But then, normally they don't talk when they're in bed together. Normally Scott will lift up the covers and Jean crawls in. Scott asks if she wants to talk but she rarely agrees and they go to bed, content with each other. This time, though, they're closer than they've ever been.

Jean can feel so many waves of emotion towards her, rush of affection and want and it's nearly enough to make her toes curl. She's nervous but she can't help herself as she leans in. It's almost questioning and Scott seems to realize it. He answers her quickly, not leaving her waiting or scared. He meets her halfway.

It's one of the softer, gentler kisses that she's had. Neither are willing to take it too far tonight and both are still nervous about the other's feelings for each other. Jean tilts her head, her eyes closed, his fingers bunching in the fabric of her nightgown and she curls her fingers into his warm skin, her other hand sliding up to tangle in his hair.

She pulls back after only moments although he chases her lips, before resting his forehead against hers. Jean thinks that she should stop it but she wants this normalcy.

"Scott," she whispers and he lifts up his head to look at her. Jean smiles softly and she leans in to kiss his lips again. This time it's fast and she smirks sweetly when she pulls back. "I'm really exhausted."

Scott laughs, nodding and settling back against the bed with her. "Isn't that supposed to be an excuse that old, married couples use?"

Jean pushes against his chest, laughing herself now and when had this joy welled in her? How could he make her feel such happiness when such a horrible nightmare had drawn her into his room? "Shut up," she tells him simply.

Jean's closer than before once they're laying down again. Her leg ends up pressed in between his, although he had adjusted her quickly when she'd tried to get too close, his cheeks flushing and she'd laughed. His arms are around her and she's curled close to his chest. With the quiet and the darkness around her, she can't help but think of the fire again but Scott's arms always keep the nightmares away.

"Scott," she whispers when they've both been silent for a while.

"Hmm?"

Jean hesitates but tonight is a night that's different than the others and she really want to know. "Do you have nightmares when I'm in bed with you?"

"No… Do you?" Scott asks, sounding half-asleep.

Jean shakes her head against his chest and the confirmation that being close keeps both their nightmares at bay is enough to let her fall asleep.


End file.
